Will Favor Find Its Way To Me?

The Art of Restraint

Guest Writer: Deidra L. Tolliver

 Have you ever been in a supermarket with the intent to purchase one item, but end up on a different aisle? Have you ever been driving somewhere specific, but end up on an unfamiliar road and forced to detour? Have you ever intended to follow a dream, map, or path, but ended up pursuing something totally different?

Or, how about this… Have you ever been in a supermarket with the intent to purchase one item, ended up on a different aisle, and ran into an old friend from high school that had strangely been on your mind? Meeting that friend, she tells you all about how she’d been thinking about you, too, and suggested that you two reconnect. Or, you were driving, headed somewhere specific, and ended up on an unfamiliar road, only to learn that a tragic accident had occurred on your usual route? Or, you intended to follow a dream, map, or path, you ended up pursuing a totally different one, and found yourself much more fulfilled than you ever imagined? Such is life! You never really “end up” anywhere. God always has a purpose for that place or space you find yourself in instead.

My childhood was a map of winding, turning, inexplicable roads, much like many of us here on God’s most beautiful Earth. I always dreamed of being an actress, singer, theater entertainer ever since I was little. I sang and played in all of my church school plays. I often expressed my desires to be an actress to my mom. However, my parent’s relationship was a verbally, mentally, spiritually abusive one; and it forced me and my mother to leave home, and relocate miles and miles away to safety. Having left my home, family, best friends, neighborhood, all things familiar, I ended up in a place of utter confusion and discontentment. I even tried to release those dreams of ever performing. But, in this new space of unfamiliarity, I ended up meeting my best friend/soul mate/husband in junior high school. After years of marriage, we had one son, and I ended up being an active homeschool educator (after a few years of theater performances, too!).

More recently, I had searched for a homeschool group that my son and I to be a part of. After asking around, looking online, even attempting to start my own group, I finally gave up and accepted that maybe it wasn’t meant to be. Somehow, I ended up at a homeschool workshop one weekend, and happened to meet a homeschool physical education (PE) coach (which was one of the main activities I’d been adamantly seeking). Coach insisted that his class was worthwhile. Would you believe that during our first PE Class, the coach’s wife mention her family’s homeschool support group and immediately extended an invitation to be a part of their homeschool group!? We were able to attend our first field trip the first week of PE as well!!! We are more active now than my calendar has space! I am so very thankful. God surely has a way of helping us “end up” in places, if only we believe.

God cares about us all and He has the best plan for our lives. He hears our prayers. Most of us here can admit that our frustrations really rest on the fact that we are not willing to wait for His perfect timing in our lives. Patience is a virtue, truly. I am praying for and seeking more patience, wisdom, and understanding. I pray that God continues to allow us all to “end up” in greater, better places and spaces along our journey.

Micah 7:7 “As for me, I watch in hope for the Lord, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me.”



Deidra L Tolliver is a homeschooling mother of one and a devoted wife. She’s a retired thespian who enjoys drawing, singing, scrapbooking, journaling, traveling, and spending time with family and friends. She moved from her hometown in Miami, Florida when she was young, but hopes to someday retire on a warm, sunny beach.



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